The Gift of Brokenness & The Art of Solitude

The companionship of brokenness and solitude…

Brokenness and solitude often carry a negative connotation. Brokenness evokes images of our weaknesses being exposed, and solitude provokes feelings of loneliness or a state of antsy-ness. Naturally, we do not want to give in to brokenness, and the world tells us to be strong and put on a face. We don’t want time alone void of distraction because then we must face who we are and our faults and imperfections – and so we do not sit still and we keep our minds busy and distracted. We have grown up in a culture that distracts us from actually searching our souls, from contemplating the consequences of our thoughts, actions, or motives, and we have accepted a shallowness in the things we choose to ponder. We must distract ourselves from solitude because the quiet makes us uncomfortable. We are a generation surrounded by distraction – we cannot concentrate unless we intentionally practice concentration because we are being raised in a culture of noise. When we are alone we pull out our iphone and go on facebook because we associate solitude with loneliness, so in moments of solitude we surround our self with our “pocket friends” who travel with us always on social media. Children who used to find their entertainment in creating stories and exploring outside, exercising the imagination, are now consumed with video games. Airplane rides that could be a time to contemplate the wonder of being thousands of feet above the earth, jumping from time zone to time zone, or a time of considering the unseen things and how the clouds and earth came into being, have become a time of zoning out in front of the TV screen.

What I have realized is: we have lost the art of solitude. Solitude is not something just for introverts, but it is something that even extroverts should pursue. We should seek out moments of solitude because it is there that we can meet with the Comforter in deeper ways. It is there that we can seek His face. It is there that the spirit of conviction comes and transforms us more into the likeness of our Savior. He speaks to us throughout the hustle and bustle of the day. He speaks to us always – in the midst of crowds, throughout daily tasks and errands, in the bathroom, you name it – everywhere! But there is something about those moments of solitude where He beckons you to come away with Him because He has something special to speak, and He wants to set your heart at rest in His presence. Those moments are training ground to refocus our thoughts and attention on the voice that wants to speak truth into our inner being, so that our heart may be attuned to hear His voice. Maybe we find this difficult because we do not recognize the voice of truth that beckons us in to His presence of peace because for too long we have heeded a voice that leads us into condemnation, foreboding thoughts, or thoughts of worthlessness, shame, or fear. We must know the voice of the Shepherd, the One who comforts, because there is also an enemy who comes to steal, kill, and destroy.

The beauty that can be found in the moments when we face our brokenness and let the Spirit of God search us in the secret place is also often forgotten. It is refreshing when we sit and let brokenness do its work in us, showing us that we are nothing but dry and broken vessels, but our Creator mends us together, restoring us to be carriers of His presence. When we are faced with those moments of solitude where we can actually engage in the deep questions that are in our heart, when we think about eternity, when we consider the areas of life where we lack integrity, we are faced with the very realness of our weakness. But the beauty found in this brokenness is that we are made perfect through the perfect love of our Savior who works righteousness and sanctification through those who are poor in spirit – for we are clothed in HIS righteousness. We find refreshing because we see that we are set free! Not because of how we strive to meet standards of perfection in our own human strength and willpower, but because Christ loved us and gave Himself for us to do what we could not do on our own. It is for freedom that Christ has set us free! It is He who makes us into conquerors and then more than conquerors. We are set free despite our weakness. God meets us in our mess and sits with us there, and He doesn’t leave. We are the ones who walk away from Him and distance ourselves from His Spirit.

There He is, standing at the door knocking. He wants to come in and dine with us, but we hang up the ‘do not disturb’ sign because we are hiding our shame, or we feel fine just as we are in the darkness of our locked room, concealing the mess that we know will be revealed by His light if He enters the room. We think: who knows what will happen if God gets into that! We don’t want a door to all of our fears, confusion, pain, shame, and regrets to be opened and exposed. Or maybe we think we feel just fine as we are – we have found comfort in what is around us, and we no longer feel the need to meet with the Comforter. And so our hearts grow numb to Him who Created us and knit us together, to the One who made us to find life and purpose in knowing Him.

But for those who know the Man knocking on the door, for those who have encountered His love – they run and fling wide the door because they know He won’t condemn them. They know His goodness, His beauty, His gentleness, His mercy and compassion. They find healing and comfort when He comes in. They know their only hope is the light that floods into the room, casting away the darkness and sin which so easily entangles.

When He walks into the room our healing begins. We find our freedom in finding our righteousness in Christ. We can’t get over the beauty of this Man who is altogether lovely, all together worthy of our heart’s devotion. He came to set us free, to bless us, to love us. He rescues us because He delights in us. He is a good, good Father who gives life abundant. He sets our hearts at rest in His presence. He is perfect justice, and He wants to make every wrong thing right. He works for the good of those who love Him. He works justice for the oppressed.

There is One who intimately relates to brokenness and solitude. He actually sought out those things. “Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” (Luke 5:16). Jesus healed the sick who came to Him and He spent time with the crowds that gathered, but Jesus also withdrew to find a spot of solitude to pray and seek the Father. He rested in the place of surrender in His brokenness in the Garden of Gethsemane when He cried out to the Father, “Not my will, but yours be done.”

He meets with us powerfully in brokenness. His strength meets us, making us strong out of weakness, making us mighty in war, victorious over everything that seeks to rob us of abundant life.

He exists in our solitude. In solitude we discover that we are not actually alone, but a very real Presence surrounds us and wants to inhabit us with the love, peace, joy, comfort, and righteousness that is found in Him.

I am learning to intentionally pursue and cherish the moments I have where I can seek His face in solitude, where I can open the door of my heart and invite Him into my brokenness so He can begin to bring greater levels of healing and freedom. Let’s actively pursue moments of solitude, where we can ask the deep questions, where we can think of what is to come – because eternity is a lot longer than what our life on earth is – eternity is therefore something we should give much thought and consideration to in our daily life. Let us not allow daily distractions to hinder us from fixing our our eyes on what is unseen and eternal.